errant thoughts...

I've always loved the "Errant Thought Roundup" from Southern Disposition. I'm not feeling particularly creative or focused today, so I thought this kind of post might fit my mood nicely. Here I go:

I love, I love, I hate, I hate,
I like, I wish, for goodness sake...
I hope, I hope, I pray, I pray, 
I will, I won't, and for today...

I love very loud music on the way to work. This is post-daycare drop off. It's my time (a whole five to seven minutes of it) and I can often set the tone for the day with some upbeat music. As you know from this post, this song is in heavy rotation in the morning.

I love counseling. I don't know how many of you see a counselor ... I certainly never did, but have started this year. It's been a very positive experience. Therapy is so ... therapeutic. (I'd insert a winky face here if this was a text.) No matter what your issues, big or small, talking helps. It prompts self-analysis and helps you to learn about yourself. Be with yourself.

I hate my inability to let things go. It doesn't matter how much I reason with myself or how many clever and insightful quotes I pin on Pinterest, hurt is hurt and it's hard not to hold on to it. I think it's something we all struggle with though, part of the human condition. No matter what though, at my core I do believe this. 

I hate the mess that the pecan trees around our house make. Everything is covered in yellow dust! And the driveway is a mess, no matter how many times we blow away everything that falls from the trees...

I like the way my hands smell after peeling mandarin oranges for my boys. They are eating them up right now! Sometimes I have hope that we will push through this chicken nugget stage and develop good eating habits. Sometimes.

I wish Will would sleep through the night! I woke up at 3:30 this morning amazed that I hadn't heard a peep from his room and basked in it for five glorious minutes... until he woke up and started crying. Poor kid. I can't be too upset; I am a terrible sleeper too. He must get it from me.

For goodness sake, tell people you love them! Friends, family, anybody, everybody. Say it when you feel it. Especially to your friends. Hug them tightly with both arms. I don't think we do that enough anymore. We need more "bosom friends" ... like Anne and Diana.

I hope my boys keep their sunny dispositions. I mean it. They are happy, happy kids... like song in their hearts, skip in their steps happy. I hope life doesn't take that from them. I'll do my best to closely guard it.

I hope I'm not screwing up too badly as a mother. It's something that I struggle with on a daily basis. The business of growing little humans is both thrilling and terrifying, energizing and exhausting, rewarding and thankless. Carry on mama... carry on.

I pray for anyone who has lost a pregnancy. Miscarriage (at any stage) can be one of the most devastating experiences for any mother  family. I know my own experiences with miscarriage have changed me. I will never be able to get through a pregnancy completely at ease. (But can anyone really?)

I pray everyone is doing okay. Even the people that annoy me. Even the people who hate me. Even the people that I hate. Because I don't really hate them. I truly want everyone to have a joyful life... I just want some people to have it far away from me.

I will drink more water. I mean it this time damn it! Why do I find this so difficult????

I won't forget to use sunscreen this summer. I've already been "burned" by that this year. (Pardon the pun.) I vow to lather up the family (and myself) with SPF one million ... and reap the benefits when I'm old and less wrinkly. 

And for today, I will celebrate the little victories of my children; rejoice in the milestones that come and go so quickly. Like this little chuck of love (see below), ten months young, who has started cruising around the living room. 

olive  juice, okay?

emily

Awwww... It turned into a kind of sentimental post, didn't it? Don't worry... it won't last! (another winky face)